MARRIAGE & RELATIONSHIP COUNSELING
Relationships are Hard and They Take Work Every day
It's understandable that we get so busy doing other things that we often put our most important relationships on the back burner. Until we hit some bumps along the way. Many times we ignore the bumps, assuming they will go away and everything will be fine. Most times, those bumps get bigger because nothing that isn't recognized, discussed and processed generally goes away. Over time resentments accumulate, discussions become angry arguments and any chance of productive interactions come to a halt.
If you are here, you may be experiencing difficulties in your relationship with your partner. Don't give up! I am a firm believer that most relationships can be improved if both parties are committed to the relationship. One of the first questions I will ask you is "Are you both in?" What I mean by this is that each of you must be open to working on the relationship, without expectations that changes will happen overnight. Remember, if you are struggling in your relationship, you haven't gotten here overnight.
What I Offer
As your therapist I will provide a combination of talk therapy and a tangible set of tools to work with. There's homework. In order to exact changes in your relationship, you have to use and practice the tools I teach you. In each of our sessions we will discuss what's happening in your relationship, look at any conflicts that occurred in the prior week, and work through them.
Understanding your partner's communication style is vital. We often expect our partners to communicate and process information the same way we do. Nothing can be further from the truth. I will teach you about your different styles and how understanding them will help you navigate conflicts in a more loving, compassionate and productive way.
Practice Makes Better
No relationship is meant to be perfect so we aim for perfectly imperfect. When we engage with our partner, we need to do so in a way that lets them know they are loved. Disagreements and arguments aren't fatal but angry, accusatory and either party negating the feelings of the other is. No matter how hard, disagreements don't have to turn into battles where one wins and the other loses. In fact, if there's a winner or a loser, you both lose.
I will help you learn to engage with the intent of hearing and understanding each other. This doesn't demand that you agree, it means you meet each other in a place of compassion and empathy. If you do this, you will find the path to a solution.